Through The Darkness
by Megz-and-Tori
Summary: Hotch and Emily have been in a loving relationship for 6 months but then something happens that could ruin their relationship forever...
1. Chapter 1

Author's note: here's a story we thought up together during one of our epic 2 hour conversations. May take a while for us to update the next chapters because we have huge workloads, stupid schools coursework! Anyway please review it and tell us what you think so far.

Disclaimer: We own nothing, Criminal Minds is not ours.... unfortunately.

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CM Hotch/Prentiss... again

It was another one of those cases. The victims were all professional women, they were found in their homes after being brutally beaten to death, but it wasn't just that, they were beaten repeatedly and strategically. The punches were few, but were hard enough to cause internal bleeding in the lower abdomen. So technically, they all died from internal bleeding and not from the beating they received. There was no sexual assault so it was the brutality of the murders that got the unsub off, and that in itself was difficult for the them all to grasp.

The team were restless; the case had taken longer than they thought to break. Finally they were on the way to arrest a suspect. The case was local, which they were glad about, in a manner, as the last case they had, they were away for 3 weeks and didn't want to go away again at least this meant they were close to home.

Hotch, Emily and Rossi went in one SUV while Morgan, JJ and Reid went in the other. As they reached the UnSubs house and all jumped out, strapping on their vests they made their way towards the house, guns in hand.

They went into the house in pairs, Rossi and JJ took the front entrance with Reid and Hotch, splitting up so Rossi and JJ could take the upstairs with the others clearing the rooms at the front downstairs. Emily and Morgan took the back entrance with Morgan slamming his foot into the door to break it open; they then strategically searched the house before meeting up with the others outside in the back garden. It was a beautifully sunny day and so they all took of their vests to keep cool, the only one appearing to not be overheated was Hotch as always, in his dark suit. They talked about where the unsub could possibly be.

"He should have been here" Morgan announced "It doesn't make sense, where else would he be?"

Reid chimed in at this "Morgan has a point; he couldn't possibly have known we were onto him, I mean we didn't know until about half an hour ago."

"Well he isn't here, so we will just have to put up road blocks and look at his profile again, but let's get back to the precinct first." Hotch replied in his authoritative voice "Besides you all look like your about to die of heat exhaustion." He continued with a small smile and a raised eyebrow.

"Seriously Hotch how is it possible that you aren't boiling?" the others laughed and began to disperse their way back to the SUVs.

(Emily's POV)

The wheels in Emily's mind during this were turning double pace; she had a feeling that something wasn't right. Although it was true that she wasn't feeling at the top of her game today so that could be part of it, but still he should have been here…

She turned around to realise the others had all gone. _Damn_ she must have stood their longer than she realised. She started to walk back to the front of the house when all of a sudden something grabbed at her arm. She turned around quickly only to feel a fist hit her on the side of her head. She fell to the floor with a thump. She was dizzy and disorientated but she just about made out the image of their unsub.

_Shit!_

Another blow hit her stomach as she staggered, attempting to stand up. It was Cyrus all over again. She fell to the floor again only to find the unsub had pinned her down so she could no longer move. She struggled but felt sharp pain again as he punched her chest. The blows kept on coming and all of her strength was leaving her. She couldn't feel anything anymore. The only hope she had was that Hotch and the others would soon realise where she was. As the wind was knocked out of her one more time she managed to whimper "Hotch…"

(Hotch's POV)

While the others had been talking, he noticed Emily zone out and go completely into her own mind, she had an amazing ability to do that, to compartmentalise and then, when she needed to, bring everything back to the surface and look at it in a new light. After announcing the team should all go back to the precinct, it would be pointless to stay there, and they knew who the unsub was so now all they had to do now was catch the guy. He left Emily there to think things through, he noticed that she wasn't feeling too well this morning and wanted to make sure she had a little time to herself, while making a mental note to query her on it later on tonight when they got home. He then headed back to the SUV he shared with Emily and Rossi. The men both stood there for a while, until Hotch felt his stomach churn. Something wasn't right she had been gone too long. He verbalised these thoughts to Rossi and then began to run.

Rossi and the rest of the team weren't far behind. When he got there the sight before him chilled him to the core, he was going to have nightmares about this for a long time. Emily was on the floor lifeless underneath the man he instantly recognised as their unsub. Without another thought Hotch produced his gun and pointed it directly at the man on top of 'his' Emily.

"Robert, this is the FBI put your hands above your head and step away from her!" he yelled. He knew the rest of the team had heard the emotion in his voice but he didn't care, all he was focused on now was Emily. The unsub raised his hand into a fist, as it made is journey towards Emily's stomach Hotch shot three times and the man's body fell lifelessly to the side of Emily's.

He ran over immediately falling at Emily's side and staring down at her.

"Emily! Emily! Wake up." He put a hand up to stroke her cheek and her eyes slowly fluttered open. He let out a huge sigh of relief. _Thank God_ he thought. She was going to be okay.

"Are you okay? Do you need an ambulance? What hurts?"

"Hotch which question do you want me to answer first?" Her mouth turned up a little at the corners as she playfully mocked Hotch. "I'm okay, just a little sore, I don't need an ambulance, I'm sure I will be fine, although I may have bruised a few ribs I'm pretty sure nothing is broken."

Hotch smiled a little looking down at her. She was going to be okay. He was scared by how much she meant to him already. He knew that he wouldn't be able to survive without her anymore. She was everything to him, and to Jack. He couldn't loose her, he had already lost so much, he couldn't loose another woman he loved so much.

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Yes we did just have Emily beat up... its mean we know but we know where its going from here, not making it up randomly, more to come. Please Review... :) please


	2. Chapter 2

Authors note: Hiya Everyone! this is our second chapter finally up yay! sorry for the wait but we have some serious work being loaded on us at the moment. Please, please, please read and review, we are still new at this so any comments are useful.

Disclaimer: Yeah we still own nothing *pouts*

Chapter Two

Hotch could see the pain in Emily's face, despite her best efforts to avoid showing any weakness. Had this have happened six months ago he wouldn't have noticed. But since he finally worked up the courage to tell her how he felt - after more than a few pep talks from Rossi – and their relationship had taken a turn for the better, he could see things in her that he hadn't before. They had managed to keep it a secret of course because they, out of all of the team, knew how to keep their emotions well hidden. They didn't want to tell anyone until they were ready and were sure that their relationship would withstand interrogations from the team. However they did still had their suspicions about Rossi. That guy was too clever for his own good sometimes and had an amazing ability to see past both Hotch's and Emily's barriers.

Hotch saw JJ walking over to Emily and decided that now would be the best time to see how she was. With someone else there, it wouldn't look so suspicious.

Emily tried to hide the pain she was in. But she couldn't keep it up much longer. She just wanted to go home and cuddle up in bed. Looking up she saw both JJ and Hotch walking towards her, she knew she was in trouble. There was no way JJ was going to let her hide her pain. And she knew Hotch was going to order her to go get checked out. She also knew her protests weren't going to stop her persistent boss/boyfriend from making sure she was okay, he was overprotective by nature and if something was actually wrong there was no way he would leave her alone.

"Hey Emily. How you feeling?" JJ asked

"I'm fine. Just a bit bruised." She lied, trying not to wince.

"No your not." Hotch said, taking the few last steps towards them. "I think you should get checked out"

_Bingo! Oh so predictable Aaron Hotchner. _Emily thought to herself as she rolled her eyes.

"I'm fine. I'll be ok in the morning." JJ and Hotch just stood and stared at Emily. "Honestly, I'm fi – ah!"

She bent over as a soaring pain shot through her stomach.

"Emily!" Hotch blurted out before he had the chance to remember that others were around him. "Your going to the hospital and that's an order." He could deal with the consequences of sending her to the hospital later, behind closed doors. And by the look she gave him, he was really in for it.

JJ put her arm round her friends back and guided her towards the SUV. "Come on, Get in. We'll take you up to the hospital."

Being in too much pain to protest she got into the SUV and judging by the look on Hotch's face, that order had come more from Aaron than from Agent Hotchner.

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Authors note: So Emily may still be in trouble... yeah it was a bit mean stopping it there so sorry but updates will hopefully be made soon. Thanks for reading, please review! :D


	3. Chapter 3

Author's note: Hiya everyone, next chapter! thanks for the reviews we are always looking on ways to improve our writing so any comments you have would be much appreciated

Disclaimer: we own nothing, nada, zip and zero *sighs*

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Through the Darkness Chapter Three

Hotch and Emily rode in their SUV to the hospital while JJ, Morgan and Reid all went in the other, Rossi had been ordered to stay behind to finish up with the local law enforcement and then would meet them at the hospital later. Once in the privacy of their SUV Hotch spoke of his concern for Emily.

"Emily, are you sure you're okay?" Hotch's concern was obvious on his face.

"I'm sore and will be bruised for a while but I'm sure everything will be fine." She said trying to sound reassuring. Hotch reached out to take her hand in his and intertwined their fingers together.

"I'm really sorry I didn't come and get you sooner, It's my fault I should have stayed behind with you, I should have-"

"Hey, hey, hey." She interrupted him. "This is not your fault. You understand me? This is no one's fault. We couldn't have known he was going to be hiding somewhere. And anyway I'm okay." He lowered his head, she knew he was going to blame himself for this and there was nothing she could say that would stop it, she just had to make him see that she wouldn't blame him, and neither would anyone else. She was about to continue on when she suddenly shouted out in pain. Hotch looked over concerned again as she brought her hands down to her stomach.

"Right that's it." He said and turned on the sirens speeding faster than he was before. He looked in the wind mirror quickly to see Morgan do the same. Emily wasn't out of the woods yet.

(We were going to leave it there but it felt a little bit harsh and short so…)

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On reaching the hospital Hotch jumped out of the SUV and ran over to Emily's side to help her out. She kept her arm clenched round her abdomen. Hotch put his arm around her back, trying to hold her straight and stop her from bending over so much.

"Hotch, you don't need to hold me. I'm – "

"Not fine" Hotch interrupted, guiding her towards the entrance. The rest of the team hadn't yet arrived. The traffic was bad, and Hotch wasn't taking any chances and put all his driving experience to the test as he manoeuvred his way round the pile-ups.

"I need some help here! I'm Agent Hotchner with the FBI," Hotch said on approach to the reception desk. He pulled out his credentials as proof when the receptionist wouldn't respond. "This is Agent Prentiss and she was beaten badly by a suspect, she's experiencing severe stomach pains and needs help." He kept his voice as steady and as professional as he could when speaking, trying to calm himself down and keep Emily as calm as possible too.

The receptionist had insisted that they sit and wait for someone to come and see them, and just when Hotch was about to lose control of his emotions, Emily let out a painful cry before doubling over and collapsing on the cold hospital floor.

"Emily!" JJ cried, running in through the doors. The team had arrived just as Emily balled over in pain.

Knelling down beside Emily, Hotch brushed her hair away from her face and yelled for someone to get a doctor.

"You'll be ok, Emily. Everything will be ok, I promise." Hotch whispered, barely audible, trying to hold his fear back in his throat and his voice cracked.

Hotch was then forced away from Emily's unconscious self as doctors and nurses surrounded her, checking her vitals as they moved her on to a gurney. As they rushed her straight up to surgery, Hotch was left surrounded by his team. The thought of never being able to hold her again, to touch her, to see her perfect smile, seemed almost unreal. It wasn't even possible to think such a thought as his mind clouded with darkness at the mere suggestion. _NO! She will make it through! She will be fine. She's Emily Prentiss, __**my**__ Emily Prentiss._

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Author's note: dum dum dum... sorry for the bit of a cliffhanger here guys but hopefully we will put the next bit up soon. we love reviews, please...


	4. Chapter 4

Author's note: Hiya everyone, Happy Easter and thanks to everyone who is following the story we love you all! Sorry about the delay in getting the chapter up but Megz had some technical difficulties for a while there. So this is our Easter gift to you all with a few shocks in here too. Hope you like it please all read and review!

Disclaimer: *sighs* unfortunately nothing is ours.

Through the Darkness Chapter Four

For four hours they had waited. She had been rushed into surgery but no one had yet explained to them what for, although they felt they already knew. By this time both Rossi and Garcia had joined them. They were all sitting, (or in Reid's case standing) in their own pool of thoughts, no one willing to say anything. Hotch looked about at each of his team and couldn't help but be proud at how close his team, or his extended family rather, were. But he also felt lost, like the family was missing a piece, which indeed it was. Emily played so many different roles in the family; she was the one that ultimately kept it together. To JJ and Garcia; she was their sister, someone who they could gossip with, have late nights with and use as a shoulder to cry on in times of need. To Rossi, she was like a daughter he never had. He could tell whenever something was wrong and Hotch had no doubt that he knew more about her than he did. To Morgan; she was a little sister whom he felt he had to look out for and protect, who always pushed him that little further and always knew how to make Morgan laugh. To Reid; she was like a mother figure. Hotch always thought Emily felt this need to protect Reid, especially after Cyrus, but not just from the evils of the world – but from Morgan's wind up tricks. As for Hotch; she was his life, she was the one that pulled him through the darkness after Foyet and Haley, who showed him he could love again and showed him the light to be found in life.

"Hotch..." being so deep in his thoughts, Hotch hadn't seen or heard Rossi approach. He looked up to see his old friend standing before him. "Come. We'll go get some coffee. Sitting around here won't be much help; she's in the best place."

Hotch looked down at the floor before, and ran a hand through his hair, he hesitated before answering "Dave thanks but..."

"Hey, I'll come with you guys. I need a caffeine boost" Reid interrupted, walking over to the two men.

Reluctantly Hotch agreed then to go with them, he stood up from the small plastic chair and stretched his back out slightly, while Morgan and Garcia followed suit. JJ decided to stay behind and call them if anything was heard, even though they would only be down a floor. When they had left JJ sat back down and rested her feet on the table next the seats, resting her head against the wall and closed her eyes. She had only been like that for a few seconds before being disturbed.

"Excuse me" JJ jumped when she heard the voice, almost falling off her seat. In front of her stood the young doctor who she remembered seeing in the ER, attending to Emily before she was brought up to surgery "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to frighten you"

"No, no it's ok. Is it about Emily? How is she?"

"She's doing well; we've managed to stabilize her. She had some internal haemorrhaging and bleeding in her lower abdomen, however we were able to stop it. Unfortunately there were some complications; we were unable to save her child."

"What?" JJ asked, taken aback by the news. "I didn't even know she was pregnant. She couldn't have been, she would have told me. And anyway, she doesn't even have a..." JJ eye's widened as realisation set in, she studied the floor before turning to look at the doors through which her team had walked through. "Hotch..." she whispered.

"I'm sorry?" The doctor asked obviously confused.

"Can I see her?"

"Sure. She's in a side room in recovery, I'll take you through. But I have to warn you, she may take her time coming round."

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Author's note: So did we shock you? Sorry its not a very uplifting story but there is a way to go yet... please all review! Thanks


	5. Chapter 5

Author's note: We are going to put them all on now so enjoy!

Disclaimer: You know the drill we still don't own a thing.

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Through the Darkness Chapter Five

As it was it didn't take long for Emily to come around at all. As soon as JJ walked into the room she heard Emily stir and looked down at her friend. It was odd seeing her here like this; she looked so weak and helpless. A far cry away from the stubborn and strong willed woman JJ knew she was. As Emily began to come around, JJ's mind was reeling. _Hotch and Emily! Really? I mean It's great but how come none of us had noticed any difference in behaviour? _As she was pondering the new found relationship her friend had with their boss the realisation of what the doctor had just told her sunk in. She had been pregnant. How were they going to deal with _this_? The team would be there to support them every step of the way, but Emily had just lost her _**child**_! And Hotch had already lost so much. Emily wasn't getting any younger either, it was no secret to the team that she wanted children especially after that case a couple of years ago, and loosing this child was going to seriously impact Hotch and Emily. JJ just hoped that their relationship would be able to cope with it.

"Hey" JJ said sitting down on the uncomfortable hospital chair by the side of the bed as her friends eyes opened, she tried to sit up before letting out a painful hiss when she realised that wasn't a particularly good idea.

JJ cringed at the pain clear across her face "How you feeling?" she asked

"Well you know when I got hit by that truck… Yeah this might be worse." She said as she winced in pain again.

"Do you remember what happened?" Concern flashed across her eyes as she thought herself about what had happened.

"Well… I remember being hit by the unsub and being in the car with Aaron… Wait where is Aaron?"

"_Aaron _ has just gone to get coffee, although believe me Dave literally had to pull him away from the waiting room so imagine he will be right back." A smile grew across the blondes face as she said this and she was rewarded by a mock pained expression on Emily's face.

"hmm, so I guess you all know now then huh?"

"Oh yeah I think we all know or have some idea…" JJ's face was distant for a moment and Emily noticed this.

"What's up JJ?"

JJ looked down at her friend and took her hand "Did you know?"

"Know what…" Emily said with a confused expression. JJ peered closer at her friend and realised that she had no idea of the pain she was about to be in. For a moment she contemplated not telling her but that thought quickly disappeared as she realised is she didn't tell her then the doctor would. It would be better for her to tell Emily, the two women had become like sisters after she came to the team but she couldn't bare the loss that Emily was about to feel.

"JJ you're scaring me, what's wrong?"

"Emily… the doctor told me that before you came in here you were pregnant…"

"What?" the panic on her face suddenly turned to a mixture of despair and anger. "Wait. No, I couldn't have been. I mean… No." Emily began to break down crying and JJ came to sit on the side of her bed and held her in her arms.

"I've lost my baby and I didn't even know it existed?" she managed between sobs

"I'm so sorry Em."

"You have to promise me you won't tell Hotch." She suddenly said seriously.

"Okay I promise. But honey, you're gunna have to tell him sometime."

"I know. But he has lost so much this year and he is already going to feel responsible for me being hurt. I'm not sure if he could cope if he knew about the baby too." Her eyes were red and puffy and the tears hadn't stopped leaking from her eyes yet so JJ hastily agreed and just held her while she wept.

A few minutes later Hotch knocked on the door and came in to see his Emily curled up in a ball sobbing in JJ's arms.

JJ saw him and nodded for him to come into the room. They silently switched places and Emily turned to cry on his shoulder as he wrapped the woman he loved around him shushing her as she cried, while running one hand through her hair to calm her down.

"You're okay. You're okay... I love you, you know that?" he said soothingly to her.

"I love you too." She said still sobbing slightly but the man with his arms around her seemed to have a magic affect on her.

JJ watched their exchange from the doorway and knew somehow that they would make it through this. If anyone could it was Emily and Hotch.

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Author's note: Yeah... not the happiest of parts and we're sorry if this is a little unrealistic because we have never encountered this situation but we tried to put ourselves in Emily's shoes. Please review!


	6. Chapter 6

Author's Note: Yay! more of the story!

Disclaimer: yeah we wish *grumble*

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Through the Darkness Chapter Six

As to be expected, Emily didn't stick around long at the hospital. As soon as the doctor had said to her she was fine to go home she was out of there – despite Hotch's best efforts to try and convince her to stay in another night "just to be safe". All she wanted to do was curl up in her own bed with a large glass of wine and good book. Although unable to convince Emily to stay longer at the hospital, it didn't take much argument for him to allow him to drive her home, rather than have JJ do it, as planned.

If Emily was to be honest with herself, she would admit she's been trying to avoid Hotch. Every time she looked him in the eye she felt ashamed of her ignorance at not knowing she was caring his child. And felt guilty of her inability to protect his child. JJ had come by the hospital everyday, mainly when the others weren't there. She was Emily's support over the past couple of days, trying to make her see that none of this was her fault, however failing.

The ride home was unusually quiet. Emily sat, staring out the window, daydreaming. Hotch could see something was troubling her but figured it was probably just down to lack of sleep in uncomfortable hospital beds. The silence between them was broken by Hotch's phone ringing.

"Hotchner... Is he ok?... No problem, I'll be there as soon as I can. Thanks." Hotch hung up, and placed her phone back on the dashboard. He placed his hand on Emily's. She turned to face him at the gesture and she intertwined their fingers.

"Who was that?" she asked.

"It was Jack's school. He's been sick so I'm going to have to go and get him. Jess is away visiting her mother for the day so I don't want to interrupt her. Hope you don't mind..."

"No, no it's ok. You go tend to Jack. He needs his daddy. I'm just going to get some rest, maybe have a nice long bath"

"Ok then."

After Hotch dropped Emily off at her apartment and he left to pick up Jack from school, she headed straight for the bathroom. She winced when she caught a glimpse of her stomach in the mirror, the bruises deep and dark. She lay in the bath, feeling her muscles beginning to unwind as they hit the warm water. The stream melted away all thoughts. She didn't want to think about what had happened or about how she was going to deal with it. Not just now, not yet. She lay in the bath for about half an hour, at many points almost falling asleep before she then headed into her bedroom, got changed into a pair of sweats and a t-shirt and collapsed on her bed, her head buried in her pillow. Slowly she drifted off into a sleep...

"Do you think we should wake her up?" she heard whispering coming from in her room... beside her, in fact. She lay still, trying to lift the drowsiness that hung over her as she concentrated on the voices.

"No, come on. We'll go back out." _JJ..._ Emily felt a small smile creep across her face at the recognition of her friends voice.

"But she needs company." _Garcia... _Emily rolled her eyes and tried to hold back a small giggle as she thought to herself, _can't get one without the other. _

"Hmmm..." Emily groaned as she rolled over to face her two blonde friends.

"See, told you she wasn't asleep." Garcia said turning to JJ and sticking out her tongue. JJ rolled her eyes, and sat down on the bed next to Emily.

"Sorry, did we wake you?"

"Yea, but it's alright."

"Hope you don't mind but I thought you might need someone to talk to outside the hospital. Pen insisted on coming along."

"Does she –"

"Know? Yea, she hacked your hospital record when she couldn't get any information out the doctor because you told him not to tell anyone. Nothing's sacred as far as she's concerned." JJ said shaking her head. "I had to tell her everything after that, because after she came to tell me what she had found, her next stop was Hotch's office, and I couldn't let that happen."

"Oh." Emily dropped her head back into the pillow.

"Honey, I'm really really sorry."Garcia walked round the bed, sitting on the other side of Emily, who then sat up, and lent against the headboard.

"So you told him yet?" JJ asked. Emily closed her eyes and shook her head. "You've got to tell him Em."

"I know, I know. But how? How do I tell him something like this?"

"There is only one way of doing it. Just tell him straight." Garcia piped in.

Emily looked at Garcia she felt her eyes begin to well up and sting. "That simple eh?"

"Nothing is ever simple, Emily, you should know that. But you've got to do something. You can't carry on the way your going, that's only going to end in both of you getting severely hurt." JJ said.

Emily felt the tears come free now. "What? More than he will if I do it now. Now or later, it won't make a difference."

"Yes it will. He'll be more hurt because you were sneaking around behind his back, because you lied and weren't honest to him. And you can't avoid him, nor can you bury you head in the sand over an event as big as that."

"JJ is right Emily. You have to tell him. Be honest. To yourself and him. You'll pull through it, together."

"But Pen, you don't understand. Hotch can't take another hit like this. What if he can't cope? What if our professional relationship is affected as well as our personal? What if... Argh, this wasn't meant to happen, it shouldn't have happened, it's all my fault!"

"Emily Prentiss! Will you get a hold of yourself?! You won't know the answers to any of these if you don't bloody tell him, will you? And it's not your fault!!!" Garcia yelled. Her sudden outburst bringing shock to both JJ and Emily. All three then burst out laughing as Garcia went bright red with embarrassment as what she just done.

"Nice Garcia. Real smooth." JJ said as she stood up and headed to the door. "I'll go get us some wine, I think."

JJ headed out the bedroom door when she saw a figure suddenly leave the hall and head into the living room. She quickly followed and caught a glimpse of them as the left the apartment. JJ quickened her pacing, running out the door to see what had been in her friends apartment, and was stunned when she found who it was. Running out of the apartment building, JJ caught up with them as they were about to enter their SUV.

"Hotch, wait..."

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Author's note: It's another dun dun dun... moment. but don't worry it will all work out at the end ;)


	7. Chapter 7

Author's note: bit of a recap here and Hotch's reactions

Disclaimer: do you reckon Megz could marry Mark Gordon and then technically half of it would be ours? (hmmm nope probably wouldn't work)

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Through the Darkness Chapter Seven

He had heard enough. He didn't want to hear anymore. The conversation he had just overheard the girls having playing over and over in his mind. His mind reaching the same conclusion every time. After he had picked up Jack, Jessica had phoned to say she was on her way home and wondered if he wanted to go out for the night and she would look after Jack. Taking her up on her offer, Hotch headed straight over to Emily's apartment. He arrived at her apartment to find the door was left open slightly, he crept in and made his way towards her bedroom, where he assumed she would be, reading one of her geeky books. When he reached her room he heard voices, so he stayed outside to hear what was being said.

"_Only is one way of doing it. Just tell him straight." __**Garcia... what's she doing here? And tell who what?**_

"_That simple eh?" __**Emily...**_

"_Nothing is ever simple, Emily, you should know that. But you've got to do something. You can't carry on the way your going, that's only going to end in both of you getting severely hurt." __**JJ**_**'s **_** here too... who's going to get hurt?**_

"_What? More than he will if I do it now. Now or later, it won't make a difference." _

"_Yes it will. He'll be more hurt because you were sneaking around behind his back, because you lied and weren't honest to him. And you can't avoid Hotch, nor can you bury you head in the sand over an event as big as that." __**WHAT? What event? She wouldn't lie to me, or be dishonest... wait...no... she couldn't have...**_

"_JJ is right Emily. You have to tell him. Be honest. To yourself and him. You'll pull through it, together." __**Emily couldn't have been dishonest, she would do that to me, to Jack. **_

"_But Pen, you don't understand. Hotch can't take another hit like this. What if he can't cope? What if our professional relationship is affected as well as our personal? What if... Argh, this wasn't meant to happened, it shouldn't have happened, it's all my fault!" _

Hotch felt a deep sickening at the mere thought of Emily with another man. What's worse is he never even saw it. This is what he did for a living, but he couldn't see the signs. He couldn't listen to it anymore, he headed straight out the apartment and over to vehicle, only to be stopped by JJ when he reached it.

"Hotch, wait..."

"What JJ?" he snapped.

"What are you doing here?"

"I came to see Prentiss. I came to see how she was feeling. But clearly she's fine with you and Garcia there, she doesn't need me." Hotch turned back round to get into his SUV.

"Hotch. Wait, what did you hear?" JJ asked, dread building up in her.

"Enough. Enough to know she doesn't want me around."

"What? Why do you think that?"

"You were in the room with her. You know why. She's been lying to me. Sneaking about behind my back – "

JJ eye's widened as she realised what Hotch thought the conversation was about. "No! That's not it!"

"No! Then what is it JJ?"

"I... I can't, you need to talk to Emily."

"I'll rather be on my own just now. I'm sure she has enough to talk about with you two in the room. I've got to get home to my sick son." Hotch then started up his engine and drove off before JJ could get another word in.

JJ stood for a minute before heading back into the apartment. She grabbed some wine glasses and a couple of bottles and headed back into Emily's room.

"Take your time" Garcia teased as she entered the room.

"What took you so long?" Emily asked.

JJ looked at the floor, wondering if she should tell her. Not tonight. "I need to go to the toilet."

"Ewww to much info!" Emily replied.

"Well you did ask..."

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Author's note: More to come...


	8. Chapter 8

Author's note: The story continues...

Disclaimer: We still own nothing... (just like five minutes ago!)

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**Through the Darkness Chapter Eight**

The night went on in a light hearted manner, they laughed and joked and watched some feel good films in order to get Emily's mind off of what had happened. It was about nine before the girls decided that they should go and let Emily sleep. On their way out JJ quickly and quietly pulled Emily aside while Garcia went to get the car started up.

"Em you need to phone Hotch." Her tone was serious and urgent which caused Emily take a step back from her friend. She was standing awkwardly with one hand across her body holding her other arm.

"JJ, what's wrong?" The confusion in her eyes was evident.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you before but I just wanted you to relax for a bit…" she mumbled the rest so Emily couldn't quite make out what she had said.

"JJ what are you talking about?" she gabbed her friends shoulders to try and focus her.

JJ looked down at her feet and said "Em, Hotch was here, he heard what we were saying but I think he took it in the wrong context…" she spluttered all in one breath.

"Wait! What are you talking about? No, that's not possible. Wait. What?"

"Well, as I went outside I saw him running away and I ran to try and catch up with him. He only heard some parts of the conversation and I think he thought you were seeing someone else."

"Well why didn't you tell him I wasn't?" Emily was visibly worried and quite angry now as she gestured towards her friend.

"He got in his car and drove off before I could."

Emily leaned against the wall of her hall and began to slide down it in defeat, realising that it probably wasn't a good idea and wincing slightly at the pain caused by her injuries. As she ran a hand through her hair and rested her head against her knees she spoke to JJ. "I have to tell him now don't I." It was more of a statement than a question but still JJ felt the need to respond to her friend so bent down next to her and put an arm around her.

"I'm afraid you do honey."

"What if he doesn't listen to me? I mean how could he think I would do something like that to him?"

"Well he may seem like a big hero, but after everything that's happened I think he is just a venerable as the rest of us. Just try and reassure him. Tell him the truth. You need to work through this together. It would have been his baby too and he has a right to know Em."

"I know, I know. Thanks JJ. I'm gonna call him now and you better go before Garcia sends in a search party."

JJ laughed at Emily's attempt to break the moment with humour, but she was right Garcia would definitely be interrogating her in the car. She waited another moment with the women she was now so close with, they had become like sisters of the past years and seeing her go through this was devastating but she knew Hotch was the only one who could fix it right now, hugging Emily she wished her good luck and then left. She just hoped Hotch and Emily could get through this; those two would become lost if they didn't have each other to lean on.

(Emily's POV)

Emily grabbed the phone off of her side table and began to dial hurriedly. She knew that Hotch would be worried and angry about what they had said or what he heard of it anyway, but seriously how could he think that she didn't love him? He was everything to her and it was ridiculous that he could think she would cheat on him, especially after what Haley did to him. She needed to set things straight. The problem was she wasn't sure whether the truth would be any better, she knew he would blame himself and she couldn't bear to watch him shut off his emotions anymore, she loved him and she would have loved their baby with all her heart too. It would have been amazing to be a mother and it was no secret to anyone on the team, even Hotch, that she wanted to be a mother some day, so the loss of her baby, even before she knew it existed tore her up inside and she knew she wouldn't be able to cope if she lost Hotch too.

The phone continued to ring and some horrible thoughts entered her mind. _Where is he? Is he ignoring me? What if he had an accident on the way home?_

"Shit!"

She grabbed her keys on the way out intent on going to his house to make sure he was okay and to straighten everything out. This was going to be a long night.

(Hotch's POV)

He slammed the car door before locking it and then struggled with shaking hands to unlock his front door and slammed that too while setting the alarm. He then punched the wall before breaking down and sliding to sit down against it, gently nursing his throbbing fist as tears began to run down his face. He couldn't take much more of this. First Haley left him with his son, and then Haley, his first love was killed by a psychopath and now Emily who he had loved more than anyone apart from his son. Why was it that everyone he loved was taken away from him? How could she do this? To him and to Jack. The tears continued to fall and he hated that. It was a sign of weakness and it wasn't solving anything, but he was so hurt and felt that he deserved to pity himself for a while.

His phone started to ring in his pocket and he looked at the caller ID, he didn't want to talk to her right now, not after she had done this to him. New rage emerged and he threw his phone across the room. He couldn't cope with this right now. The women he loved with all his heart had cheated on him. This was a nightmare; it had to be, Emily wouldn't do this to him. She was too nice, too caring, too beautiful, too perfect. No it couldn't be the truth. He must be mistaken, and yet he wasn't and he couldn't bear to think about what he was going to do anymore. His whole life had just shattered all around him.

His phone kept ringing from under the table where it lay. He stared at it, seeing it light up the room. Eventually he got up and made his way through to the bathroom and turned on the shower. He stripped down, catching a glimpsed of himself in the mirror as he was about to enter the shower. His scars from Foyet were as clear as day, white lines dashed across him stomach. He remembered the pain he went through as each of the marks were made, every time Foyet sliced into him. He remembered wishing them to stop, willing his strength to come back to fight. As he stared at the mirror he wished he was back there, that Foyet was stabbing him again. To him, physical pain was easier to deal with than emotional, he would rather face Foyet's knife again, than go through to hurt and pain that Emily was putting him through just now.

He got into the shower and stood there, trying to understand. Trying to break it all down and prove to himself that it was a misunderstanding, that he had heard wrong like JJ had said. Surely he had misheard; she wouldn't do this to him. But each time he couldn't see another meaning for the conversation he had overheard. It always boiled down to the same conclusion.

He couldn't understand why she would do this to him. What had he done wrong? What had he done that made her turn to the comfort of another man? And why hadn't he seen it? Sure Emily was good at putting on a mask at work - they had to be good at that in their profession - but ever since they had started dating he had been able to see through her mask, as was she able to see through his. So why was he, this time, so blinded and unable to see what was happening behind his back? Looking back on it, he still couldn't make pick at her behaviour that would suggest such a thing. Not only was Hotch now left questioning his ability to love another, but now his ability to do his job.

He stood under the heat of the shower the water pounding on his face and shoulders, attempting to wash away everything that had happened. He didn't realise that he was crying until later.

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Author's note: Not the happiest of chapters but it needed to be said... please review!


	9. Chapter 9

Author's notes: We think that we are nearing the end of the story but may be persuaded to write more by people reviewing?

Disclaimer: still got nothing *goes off in huff*

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**Through the Darkness Chapter Nine**

Emily jumped out the vehicle as soon as it was outside Hotch's apartment. She had tried phoning him on her way over multiple times but each time it had rung out. It had been almost 3 hours since Hotch had overheard the conversation, since he had been left thinking that she had cheated on him. She couldn't even begin to imagine what was going through Hotch's mind at that time. She knew it might be hard convincing Hotch that she hasn't and never would cheat on him without telling him the truth. However she was also unsure of which she would rather have him deal with; her cheating on him, or the loss of his unborn child, of which he had no idea existed.

She ran into the apartment building and straight to his door. She knocked on the door, however heard no movement on the other side. She knew he had made it here ok, his SUV was parked out the front. She knocked louder, but still no reply.

"Aaron... I know you're in there, please let me in." It was returned by silence. "Aaron, come on please."

A few seconds later she heard movement coming from inside the apartment. The door was then unlocked and opened. Hotch stood at the other side, not even looking at Emily, just walking away, leaving her to enter herself and close the door.

Hotch stood at one end of the living room, with Emily at the other. Emily tried to read him, tried to see if there was anything in his eyes that would let her know what he was thinking, let her know how she should approach him, but she couldn't. As usual, Hotch had put his mask on and was letting no-one through. They stood in silence both unsure of what to say.

Unable to contain herself anymore, Emily broke the silence. "Aaron, what you heard... or rather... what you ... erm, think you heard it's... it's not true. I wouldn't, I couldn't do that to you, to us."

"And what was it you believe that I THOUGHT I heard?" Hotch relied, his voice stern and calm, revealing nothing of his emotions.

Emily stared at her feet, trying to find the right words. "JJ said that you think that I am... that I've been seeing another guy." She looked back up at Hotch, meeting only a stare she normally saw him give Strauss. "I haven't. You've got to believe me. You've completely misunder-"

"Misunderstood have I! What's not to understand? What other 'event' could the three of you have been referring to? What is it that you can't tell me because it would tip me over the edge?" His voice was rising as his anger grew.

"Just believe me when I tell you that I never cheated on you." Emily closed the gap between her and Hotch, standing in front of him. She raised her hand to meet his cheek. "I've never lied to you before, I'm not going to start now. Trust me, please."

Hotch pulled away and moved towards the chair, sitting on it with his head in his hands. He ran his hand through his hair before looking up to find Emily sitting on the sofa next to him.

Hotch took a breath in, calming himself down before talking. "If you haven't slept with someone else, then what is it that you felt you couldn't talk to me about? Why did you turn to JJ and Penelope instead of turning to me for help?"

"Because I couldn't face you. I still can't. The thought of telling you what happened scares me, because it makes it all the more real and I don't want it to be." Her eye's began to well up, one tear sliding down her cheek.

Seeing the look in Emily's eyes, the pain she was going through and the fear of what she knew was to come, Hotch knew she had to be telling the truth. Hotch let his mask slip, and met Emily eyes. "Face me about what? Emily, please, just tell me. What is it?"

Emily drew a breath. She knew there was only one way to tell him. "When you took me to the hospital, and they tried to stop the internal bleeding...." Hotch nodded moving his hand onto her lap "they found something else, or rather... I lost something else..." Her voice was barely audible, Hotch was unable to catch her last few words. The tears came freely to Emily now. She was shaking uncontrollably. Hotch moved to her side, wrapping his arm around her back, hoping that he would be able to hear her.

Emily looked up at Hotch, "I was pregnant Aaron." She whispered, her voice wavering.

Hotch's eyes widened as the realisation set it as to what she said. She _was_ pregnant. "Did... did you know?"

Breaking eye contact, Emily put her head in her hands. She shook her head. This was the thing that was tearing her up the most. Sure she was heartbroken that the lost her child, but what hurt more was that she didn't know it had existed.

Hotch didn't know what to say. He felt guilty for even thinking that she could have cheated on him. He should have known. He pushed her away, just when she needs him most. He moved and closed the gap between them pulling her close to him so her head rested on his shoulder "I'm so sorry." He whispered in her ear. "Emily…"

They sat on the couch in each others arms, both crying over their lost child for what seemed like hours. Eventually they were both exhausted from the tears that fell before. They just curled up and feel asleep tangled together both realising that something was missing, and it was lost forever.

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Author's note: Again not a happy chapter sorry about that but there is still more...


	10. Chapter 10

Author's note: Right this might be the final chapter guys but if we get loads of reviews telling us to continue on for a bit more then we could be persuaded to ;)

Disclaimer: If we owned it Emily and Hotch would already be together and living happily ever after (well almost)

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**Through the Darkness Chapter Ten**

Hotch woke up and felt his neck and back aching before realising he was on the couch in his apartment, it took him a while to remember exactly what had happened yesterday and where he was, but as he looked down and saw Emily everything came rushing back to him, and he didn't like it one bit. She hadn't cheated on him, but they had lost their baby. No wonder she was being off with him, _she was trying to deal with this on her own, because she thought it would hurt me too much_. His first reaction was that they will deal with this, they would get through it. He loved her too much to let anything ruin what they had. Of course he would have been ecstatic if Emily had told him she was pregnant and she needed to know that. But he didn't want to hurt her even more. Then the thought suddenly dawned on him, _This was my fault, I should have been there. I should have realised sooner that something was wrong. If I had Emily would have been fine and so would their child. _He was suddenly awoken from these thoughts by Emily's voice.

"Don't you dare even go there Aaron." She said in a croaky morning voice.

"I thought you were asleep. And don't go where?" She moved slightly so she was facing him and put her arms around his neck, while he put his arms around her waist.

"Yeah well you were thinking too loudly" she said with a small smile. He returned her smile and lifted an eyebrow

"Oh yeah? And what was I thinking then agent Prentiss?"

Her smile faded as she looked deeply into his dark eyes. "This wasn't your fault Aaron. You couldn't have known this was going to happen, and I didn't even know I was pregnant. We can't blame ourselves. It happened and it sucks, big time, but we are just going to have to deal with it."

Hotch looked at her beautiful face for a moment. "I'm really sorry I got the wrong idea what you girls were talking about. I should have known, I do know, that you would never… that you wouldn't… I love you, you know that right? And I would have loved our baby too."

She sighed slightly "That's okay I should have told you straight away anyway, I was just scared about your reaction. And I love you too."

He closed the gap between them and kissed her gently on the head. "We are just going to have to be open with each other about this; we can get through it together." He unconsciously pulled her closer to him.

"Aaron…" Her voice wavered slightly despite herself and Hotch noticed it.

"What's the matter?" She suddenly tensed in his arms and pulled away so she was sitting on the edge of the couch.

"If we are going to be honest, I have to tell you about something." Emily's arms wrapped around her stomach in a protective gesture that Hotch noticed, he edged closer to her to give unspoken support.

"I'm listening…" Hotch was confused now but wanted to make sure that she was okay.

"Do you remember that case a while back, the one with my friend Matthew?"

"Yes…"

"He, he helped me through a tough time when I was fifteen. We moved around lots and I wanted to fit in, I wanted friends, so I um… I kind of…"

Hotch edged closer again and put a hand on her knee in an attempt to encourage her further "It's okay I understand. Go on…"

"I… I ended up getting pregnant and Matthew, he helped me."

"You got an abortion." It was more of a statement than a question but Hotch now knew where this was going and it was all he could do to retain himself and not ask for all the guys she knew back thens addresses so he could go and punch the hell out of any of them who touched her.

"Yeah… It was one of the hardest things I have ever done. Sometimes I regret it, but back then it felt like my only choice. I couldn't tell my mum and well… it just seemed like my only option."

Hotch pulled her into his chest and hugged her for what seemed like ages. Finally she whispered "I just thought you should know."

"Thank you for telling me that sweetheart. I know it was hard for you. I love you."

"Can we go and get something to eat now?" Hotch laughed at this and realised that he was starving too. He stood and helped Emily up.

"Most definitely. I will make us some pancakes while you go and take a shower. Just call me if you need any help. Okay?" He kissed her on the head and then began to walk away.

"Okay… and Aaron?" He turned around quickly.

He turned to see a sly smile on Emily's face and her head tilted to the side "I love you too."

Hotch started making breakfast and smiled to himself. Yeah they would make it through this just fine.

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Author's note: please please please review!


	11. Chapter 11

Author's Note: So here you have it, the final chapter. You asked and we delivered. It's a lot more light hearted than the rest of the story, to say the least. Anyway, not going to tell you anymore... please read and tell us what you think

Disclaimer: *hacks into Criminal Minds network* bingo! ownership documents... *sees lawyers* oh dear would you look at the time *runs!!* damn it! still can't get my hands on them!

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Three months had gone by since that day which had left Emily had feeling so lost and so alone. Three months had gone by since that night where Emily had broken down in confession to Aaron about what had really happened that day. Three months had gone by where each day Emily and Aaron's relationship had grown ever stronger. They had been through the darkness, been through the night and now Emily believed that everything was going to be okay. After that night, Aaron had insisted that she move in with him and Jack. At first, she had to admit, she was a little sceptical. She was scared, unsure of how their relationship would be able to pull out of the dark, how they would be able to hold on to each other. Looking back on it she realised how stupid she was to have believed such things. She should have had more faith in them, in their relationship and in themselves. She underestimated her own ability to be able to pick herself up and get on with life, she underestimated her own ability to do what she did best, believe that everything was fine, that everything would work out in the end. But she believed that most of all she underestimated their love for one another.

As she stood there in front of him, the feeling she had when she looked him in the eye and told him what she had just found out, only confirmed her stupidity. The look in his eyes as he stood out from behind his desk and ran towards her, lifting her into his arms, did all to destroy the doubt she once felt.

She knew she should have waited until they were in a more private space, away from the preying eyes of the rest of the BAU team. But she couldn't wait; she didn't want to wait any longer.

The squeals and laughter that came from Agent Hotchner's office attracted the attention of the rest of the team. Even Dave and JJ poked their heads out of their offices to see what all the fuss was about. Garcia had even managed to hear it from within her office. With furrowed brows, they all made their way over Hotch's office. They were all curious as to what was making Hotch laugh so much. They had never heard Hotch laugh that much since... come to think of it; they had never heard Hotch laugh that much.

Dave poked his head through the door first, enterly slowly untill Garcia push him in. Followed swiftly by JJ, Morgan and Reid. They all stood taking in what they we're seeing. Hotch had Emily lift in his arms, swirling round in the spot, stopping every couple of seconds to place her down and kiss her short and sweet on the lips before swirling her again. When the couple realised they had an audience they stopped. They laughed at the confusion in their teams face's before Hotch captured Emily mouth, but this time in a longer, passionate kiss. When he pulled away to breath, both his and Emily's hand instinctively moved to her lower stomach, never breaking eye contact. Their moment broken by a squeal from Garcia.

As they were surrounded by the rest of their BAU family, Hotch's office filled with the laughter and happiness. In the moment Hotch realised that Emily had been pulled to the side by Garcia and JJ, both trying to get as much information as possible. Hotch himself was surrounded by the guys, although they were not as persistent as the girls. Emily looked over a Hotch and mouthed "Help me!" causing him to laugh and then started to usher the team out his office.

"Oh, come on Hotch! We wonna know details!" Garcia moaned.

"Come on sexy girl, let's go and leave these two alone." Morgan said, as he pulled Garcia away from Emily. JJ followed with Reid leaving Rossi behind. He looked over at Hotch, with a small knowing smile and raised his eye brows. Hotch nodded and let slip a small chuckle before Rossi reached to shake his hand. "Good luck" He gave a small smile and nod to both Hotch and Emily before leaving the office and closing the door behind him. Emily, confused, turned to her boyfriend.

"What was that about?" She asked as he turned back round to face her.

"You'll see…"

Emily furrowed her brows as she look up at Hotch, slightly confused "Hmmm"

Hotch wrapped his arms around her waist, pulling her into him, unable to keep the smile off his face.

"I'm guessing your happy then." Emily whispered as she leaned in to Hotch, placing a small, gentle kiss in his lips. Only to be replied by a chuckle from Hotch.

He looked down, looking deep into her eyes. In them he could see his future, the past dissolving. He saw his new family, his new life. He had been planning on waiting until they had gotten home before asking her. But on light of certain… news, he didn't want to wait. Reaching into his coat pocket he pulled out a small velvet box. The look in her eyes told him all that he needed to know.

"I'm never letting you out of my sight, you or the baby. I was going to wait but it seemed fitting that I ask now. And considering this is where we… re-met, I guess is the right word if its even a word," he cursed inwardly for mumbling but smiled when he heard Emily laughing, "this seems like the right place" taking the ring from the box he lowered himself onto his knee keeping one hand in hers "I love more than I ever thought possible to love someone. We've had our… difficulties, but we pulled through it, stronger than ever before and I want us to get stronger, I want us…" he placed his hand on her stomach "to be a proper family. I want you to be Jack's mother and I want you to be mine. You have my heart, you're always on my mind, and I want us to be one. Emily Prentiss, will you do me the honour of marrying me?"

Slowly the look of shock and disbelieve left Emily's face, only to replaced by a shy smile and tears of joy as she let out the breath she realised she was holding. Finally she spoke, her voice a whisper, "Yes." Aaron slipped the ring on her finger as he stood up, wrapping her arms around her waist and pulling her into his embrace. He kissed her slowly, letting all he felt for her seep through. When they broke away for air, he rested his forehead on hers.

"Promise me something…" Hotch whispered.

"Anything" she replied, looking deep in his eyes.

He pulled back, the smile left his lips and Emily could see the worry in his eyes, he hesitated "When we go on cases, you stay at the precincts. You don't come on raids, you don't interrogate suspects. You can go to the crime scenes, and then you stay where it is safe – "

"Aaron…"

"No Em, hear me out. I don't want to go through it all again. This way I can ensure your safety, I can protect you, both of you. Please..." Hotch knew Emily could be very stubborn and if she didn't want to do something then she wouldn't. But this time he wasn't going to back down. "I'm not telling you as Hotch. I'm asking you as Aaron. Please, I love you too much to see you go through it all again."

Seeing the pain and love in his eyes as he spoke, Emily knew that there was no point in arguing. He just wanted to protect her, to protect their child. And to be truthful she had been thinking the same.

"OK"

At this his eyebrows raised "OK?"

"Yes Aaron, ok.

"Wow, to be honest I was expecting to have to persuade you more than that."

"I understand Aaron. You want to do everything you can to keep us safe. But you have to realise that you can't control everything. We will do everything possible to protect our baby but you can't wrap us up in bubble wrap. We can't always predict what will happen and you can't always ensure our safety. We just have to do the best we can, and lessen the chances of anything bad happening." she leaned into his body, nuzzling her nose into the crook of his neck.

His eyes closed as he rested his head on hers. "I know sweetheart. I just want to do everything in my power to protect my family."

"And you will Aaron. God help any boy who tries to date our daughter."

"Oh believe me, _if_ we have a girl she is not dating until she is thirty, at _least_, I don't care what you say."

"I think if we had a daughter she might have a problem with that. Although I'm sure that with both you and Jack she will be fully protected from any boy who steps within a foot of her."

They both chuckled lightly and his arms tightened around her body, holding her close. "I love you Em."

He felt her smile and her warm breath against his neck as she whispered "I love you too."

They stood for what felt like hours, just holding each other, with smiles on their faces, thinking about their future together, never looking back on the dark past events. They had made it through the darkness and they were never turning back.

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And there you have it. Its all fluffy. Tell us what you think. Hope you have enjoyed reading it as much as we have writing it. Please review :)


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